A Better Way to Communicate (Even When You’re Heated)

Hey girlfriend! Ever feel like you're on the edge—ready to snap, shut down, or just ghost the world altogether? We’ve all been there. Life moves fast, and it’s easy to get caught in cycles of miscommunication, hurt feelings, and emotional disconnection. That’s where the POP method comes in: Presence, Openness, and Positivity. It’s a simple but powerful way to check in with yourself and others—especially when tensions rise and you're tempted to pop off. All three feed into each other—and together, they create powerful change.

Presence

Presence keeps us grounded in the now. It helps us avoid dwelling on past mistakes or anxiously anticipating the future. It also pulls us out of distractions like social media or mindless scrolling. Life gets busy, but carve out intentional moments. Time is the one thing we can never get back—making it the most valuable gift we can offer anyone, especially those we love.

Openness

Openness gives us room to create a new narrative. Don’t jump to conclusions about someone’s actions or reactions. Don’t assume this situation will go as all of them have gone before. Instead, give yourself space to reflect before responding. What do you actually want to communicate? What do you need? When we remove judgment and drama from the equation, we create a space for clarity and connection. Closed hearts don’t get held and closed mouths don’t get fed.

Positivity

Positivity flows naturally when you’ve rooted yourself in presence and openness. When you speak to yourself and others with compassion instead of criticism, you allow healing and growth to take place. Relationships evolve—and that’s not always a bad thing. Look for the good. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Most people don’t hurt us intentionally; they’re just trying to soothe their own wounds, and sometimes that causes unintentional pain in return. Remember, we are all humans doing our best to navigate life, and naturally mistakes are made.

This process won’t feel natural at first—especially if you're unlearning patterns of unhealthy communication. It might feel awkward or forced, but with time and consistency, it becomes second nature. You can’t hate someone into change— you have to love them into evolution. This applies to others and yourself. It’s okay not to see eye to eye. Disagreement is normal, disrespect is not. Aim for negotiation, not escalation.

When you lean into Presence, Openness, and Positivity, you create space for healing, understanding, and real connection. So the next time you feel like popping off—try the POP method instead. You might just shift the entire conversation—and the relationship—with one mindful moment.